single mums chat Post a reply

[meabh]

meabh

 

Posts: 338

hey,
i thought i'd start this for any single mums who want a chat or a rant!
i've a 2 1/2dd who's an angel most of the time but still drives me mad as i never get a break!
for anyone else who's in the same situation let me say you're not alone!
*meabh*

[yummymummy]

yummymummy

 

Posts: 11087

hey meabh!!
i have a 6 1/2 yo ds, the 1/2 is very important to him
boy do i wish i could go back to the 2 1/2 years as all i get now is mind your own business and whatever mam, but ya have to laugh as its so innocent

[meabh]

meabh

 

Posts: 338

haha... my dd keeps on giving out to me these days... it's all "don't touch my milk mammy" or "stop sitting in my chair mammy"

[pinkbabe]

pinkbabe

 

Posts: 6482

My DD is 7 & my DS is 5

both are full of attitude @ the min total tweenagers

[paulaob]

paulaob

 

Posts: 2

My DD is 7 & my DS is 5

both are full of attitude @ the min total tweenagers

hi im paula i have a two and half year old daughter and a one year old son

[paulaob]

paulaob

 

Posts: 2

My DD is 7 & my DS is 5

both are full of attitude @ the min total tweenagers

hi im paula i have a two and half year old daughter and a one year old son

[pinkbabe]

pinkbabe

 

Posts: 6482

Hi Paula

Its ages since I wrote that post my DD is now 9 & DS is 7 now practically grown ups

The age gap is very similar to your pair

[MauraH]

MauraH

 

Posts: 6

there hasn't been any posts on here for a while so hope there still are some single mums on here. My daughter is 9yo and she is wonderful, we've been just the 2 of us since her dad died when she was 11months old.

At the moment she is having bit of a hard time at school, due to not having a "best friend". I was speaking to a friend about this and she thinks its the age as she's had similar conversations with some of her other friends & family. My daughter has lots of friends and is generally very happy in school but recently has been talking bout not having one special friend...has anyone else had similar issues with their children and any advice?

Maura

[yummymummy]

yummymummy

 

Posts: 11087

Im very sorry to hear about your loss Maura!!

As regards of a "special" friend.......Im kinda like that myself I dont have 1 but I do have 5-6 of them which is alot more special, maybe you could explain this to your daughter..I know its hard at her age but she is much better of having a few close friends then having just 1 that she finds to be the special one.

I have a boy myself who is nearly 9, think boys are different he is quite happy to play with several diff children and has never mentioned to me about not haivng one. Maybe some of the other girls here would have better advice for you.

[MauraH]

MauraH

 

Posts: 6

thanks YummyMummy....love the name!

I've explained that to her and she understands it but I suppose when all the other girls have a best friend she feels left out. She plays with all the girls in her class and has quiet alot of friends, I just think this has become a bit of a thing for her at the moment. Thankfully she skipped off happily today and say she was going to have a great day in school and have lots of fun.....so fingers crossed!

Yeah, boys are so different in so many ways from a very young age.

M

[nickysinglemum]

nickysinglemum

 

Posts: 281

hi am nicky i have a 3 and half year old girl who acts like a 13 year old

[Wilson]

Wilson

 

Posts: 20

Hi

My son is 12 and his father left us (him when he was just turned 3. I noticed straight away even at that age he looked for friendships especially girls (or maybe it was there were just more girls around). He even acted out getting married and then his friend divorced him all at primary school. Which really hurt him.

He has always been popular and played easily with most children. I have been concerned though at the effort he has made to befriend and now he is at secondary (grammar) school he appears to have a lot of girl friends - maybe he is just popular with everyone and the girls hang around with him because they like him a lot. i wondered if he was trying to make up for the lost relationship bewteen his dad and I. he was always wanting him back with me but i could not make that happen and it devastated us.

I have thought of one special friend for him but then that is not always a good idea either in case something happens . I encourage him to have friends rather than just one but thought at the time it may have been easier for him to have one special friend to get closer too.
I wonder also if I meet someone ever will it fall back into place and his efforts will stop or at least be more relaxed or maybe it is just me.

[pookie2]

pookie2

 

Posts: 47

Can I join in too? I'm not a true single parent, as my husband is still with us, but he works overseas usually 3rd world places, so I'm often on my own with our 2 DSs for up to a couple of months at a time. I'd guess I have some of the same problems - loneliness, no father figure on a daily basis, no one to discuss worries with. Also, two kids under 3.5 full time on your own is draining. I have no family this side of the country to help out either. Not moaning, or anything. Just looking for people with similar difficulties to chat to now and again....

[Wilson]

Wilson

 

Posts: 20

funny that i am single having divorced a few years ago now time flies - but before that my husband worked away and left me most days alone in england. i wondered why life was difficult but in hindsight i see I was on my own really and after a first difficult birth - doctors not supportive.

this probably explains why i still feel married nothing has really changed.

[maryb]

maryb

 

Posts: 6

• E-mail maryb

Hi, my name is mary, i am a single parent living in the countryside near carlow. I have 2 boys, liam is 12 and dean is 7. I find it hard to get a babysitter and i find that the biggest problem i have. Does anyone have any suggestions? And i really empathise with other single parents, sometimes it feels like a prison sentence, but i know it all worth it, also if any other single parents want to chat about day to day stuff, please send me a message, a problem shared is a problem halved. Thanks for listening, all the best!!!!!!!

[Nickiedolly]

Nickiedolly

 

Posts: 11

• E-mail Nickiedolly

Hiya guys,

Well,as I've said before i call it a touch of SMS....Single mother syndrome.... Quite catchin!
I don't know what the slang translations are here or maybe I'm a bit slow,like DD and DS. Are they new bra sizes or sumthin??

Seriously though,I really empathise with Mum's who don't get enough time to themselves or get sitters. I myself have a little boy and a little girl. Their Dad takes them every weekend though which is great. Was a tough few years but relations are alot better now.

I still though find during the week tough. I work a couple of hrs a day and also do voluntary work one evening a week. Bit of a disaster area when it comes to relationships and haven't had much luck. I find that the hardest thing lately is the "on my own" bit. Little things like the kids giving me a tough time or just the day to day silly things,having to make all the decisions and do the lot on you're own.

Was so down in dumps a few weeks ago because I woke up sick but had to get into work and drop kids to school. I really felt it then,like there was no one to prod and say,could you get up,think I'm gonna be sick.

One of the worst days,I got through it though which was great and being independent is very liberating and great but suppose I think sometimes,I just think, I look after the kids,the house,all the bills,the parties,the sicknesses and be nice to have someone to look after me.
Jeez,sound so bad whinin,its not a feckin lonely hearts column!

Girls,feel free to have a rant back. I'm great at other people's stuff! lol

[Wilson]

Wilson

 

Posts: 20

Hi Maryb and all

I am on facebook or operation transformation facebook if you wish to get in contact via discussion board groups or emotional eating in the first instance. Won't be visiting mumstown for a few months now.

Eileen Wilson

[yummymummy]

yummymummy

 

Posts: 11087

Nickiedolly

Im in the same boat.......have a 8yo son and been practically single for 6 years (well 5 if you count a couple of men that i dated for a while) and im beginning once again to fecking hate it!!!!!!!!

I get bouts of i love the single life blah blah and now im gone the other side now and hate it. My ds goes to his dads at the weekend, all and i mean ALL my mates are either married or paired off for years....it can be very frustrating altogether. I love my fridays alone tho but once sat hits and you have been in all day doing nothing and sitting in again that night doing nothing, well im sure you have had the same, we dont need to go into detail haha.

Its very frustrating and also very pitiful at the same time, I hate feeling this way as Im a very independent person, i dont NEED a man........but I do want one. AAAAGGGGGGHHHH the joys of it all.

[newmum20yrs]

newmum20yrs

 

Posts: 4

• E-mail newmum20yrs

Hi, I'm a single mum too. a new one actually, my babys just 5 weeks old. It's definately not as tough now as it will be in years to come but in a way I sometimes think it couldnt possible get harder. Having a newborn and living alone is really not easy... especially because im only 20 yrs old so none of my friends can identify with it really. theyre great and really supportive but they still cant understand the actually challenges it presents...

im new to this site, trying to meet other mums as close to my age as possible... please let me know if ur out there! sometimes it feels like the only other women with kids are in their 40s!

[yummymummy]

yummymummy

 

Posts: 11087

Hey newmum20.....

I became a single parent when my ds was 3 so even though I can feel your plight mine was somewhat different as in my son was alot older. He is 9 now and we are grand

Have you tried going to some parent toodler groups? or the coffee mornings??
Join us in inane chat too for some like minded chat.....

[suzieQ]

suzieQ

 

Posts: 55

• E-mail suzieQ

Hi newmum20,
Im a single 21 yr old living alone with my DD who is 1! Lived at home with y parents until my DD was 7 months and living alone with her as been the best experience ever. Its hard sometimes but its incredibly worth it.
Think i get about 18 hrs a week to my self. When Im working or her dad has her! But i wouldnt change it for the world. DD just started walking so the fun is just beginning.
This site is brilliant for any help and guidancce you need. I find myself on it nearly every day!!
good luck and take care!
SuzieQ

[beedee]

beedee

 

Posts: 7

• E-mail beedee

Hi guys can I join in? New to this site.
I have one boy who is 5 in 2 weeks and he's starting junior infants on monday. It's just the two of us - FAF has been AWOL since I was 20 weeks - thankfully I'm loooong over him

Look forward to chatting with you all